Levels of doomed oneupmanship reached new heights across North London today as Paul Barber, Executive Director of tottenham hotspur, (alleged “Football Club”,) very nearly bragged his own balls off about their planned new stadium.
“Fans want a better atmosphere than the Emirates,” Barber said.
“Our architects have drawn up plans to make the front row of seats at the new stadium 5 metres closer to the pitch than the Emirates.”
Fuck! They must have architects working with an exact scale replica of the Emirates and they just tinker around with it a bit to give them a piffling sense of superiority. Dye it white, for example. that’s a good start. We may have a crap team and be the worst run club in the world, but I am oh so much closer to Pascal Chimbonda than you’ll ever be. I can really smell the pungent stench of mercenary mediocrity. Wow. Now could you fill it with a really good team? Didn’t think so.
Chairman Daniel Levy added “Too often new stadiums are surrounded by empty, dead space and we did not want that in Tottenham.”
And if he was telling the whole truth he would have added “We keep our empty, dead space on the pitch, and in my thick bald head, and in our trophy cabinet. But by God, we won’t tolerate any around the pitch, that would be dreadful.”
Tags: 5 metres, Daniel Levy, empty dead space, tottenham hotspur
May 14th, 2009 at 11:43 am
bloody spuds. I’m glad they didn’t get relegated so we can get our 6 points of them next season.
May 14th, 2009 at 11:56 am
thing is, as pathetic as it is for spurs to almost replicate the emirates, i’ve always called for the seats to be closer to the pitch, esp the two areas behind the goal the gap is faaaaaaar too big, way too much room for the photographers and stewards.
May 14th, 2009 at 12:00 pm
good new arenas ,need good players, t-spurs shit dont add a thing so fuck u spurs, ash-b, the best in uk .u shant be their next season 2009-10 fuck u skin heads.
May 14th, 2009 at 12:03 pm
Idiot though he is – Spurs obviously have atmosphere high up on their list of priorities for the new stadium, whereas it was about as important as the colouring of the pipes for whoever designed the emirates….
May 14th, 2009 at 12:08 pm
What are they going to call it? Pipedream Lane?
As usual Spurs officials are talking up what they are going to do. Last 4 seasons thay have talked about gaining a champions league spot and what have they done in that regard?
Failed!
As for this silly thing about their stadium will be better and cheaper and magical etc; The latest planning and safety rules forbid the viewing public from being any closer to the pitch than at The Emirates.
Of course most Spurs fans will believe the hype about the stadium even though it isn’t built, isn’t funded and hasn’t even had its first planning meeting (and good luck with that) because the vast majority of them are inbred retards.
So they can add 20,000 seats but the combined IQ of the audiance will still be 40.
May 14th, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Spurs are shit and will finish even lower than this year.I just hope Arsene buys experience so that I can renew my season tickets
May 14th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Dead empty space = trophy cabinet
Classic. Great article
May 14th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Breaking news….Haringey council have just rejected plans for the proposed new Spurs stadiam on a local park. A spokesperson for the council said ” It’s one thing having a fun fair there twice a year but a circus every fortnight is not acceptable”
May 14th, 2009 at 4:00 pm
hahaha i cant wait to hear them say they will finish above us next season hopeful suckers
May 15th, 2009 at 4:52 pm
POOR POOR SPUDLES ……seems that brains taht function (IF THEY GAT ANY) always come in handy but SHARE IT AMONG YOURSEVES AND U GAT NOTHING BUT RAT LIKE INTELLIGENCE ……SO GO MAKE PLANS ON HOW YOU WILL ANNOUNCE DETAILED PLANS ON HOW YOU WILL QUALIFY FOR LOL ……. EUROPA LEAGUE NEXT SEASON ……STICK TO YOUR CAPABILITIES BEFORE UR TAKEN IN FOR INSANE THOUGHTS.
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